It's crazy the things I imagine doing with this kid. He'd prob never talk to me again if he knew. Sigh, if only we got a little bit closer, if only I could close that gap between our bodies, if only we could hold each others' hands, if only I could stare into his eyes as we rolled around on a bed all night long… If only he didn't already have a girlfriend.
It's always the same. Just friends, if that. They will never get to see all I can be, all I can give, all we can do, if only they let me break down the high walls of my flooded heart. Emotions, thoughts gushing and overflowing but there's nowhere for them to go. I'll just drown here in my misery under the weight of this crush while you go off and give her one more kiss.
The sad life of a hopeless romantic.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Monday, July 8, 2013
Saturday, July 6, 2013
I think my biggest fear is that I will die the same way I lived - with my thoughts locked away in my mind. I fear that I will never be open. I fear that I'll never be able to speak my mind freely with another person, that I'll never have someone know my life story. I fear that I'll never have made a difference in a single person's life by the time I leave this world. That's what scares me: feeling like just an insignificant speck on the face of the planet whose life was utterly indifferent to the world.